First Entry:

Q: What do you get if Santa goes down a chimney where the fire is still on?

A: Crisp Cringle

Second Entry:

One day a man walked into a bar and sat down next to a guy with a parrot on his shoulder.

The bartender said, "Cute parrot, does he talk?"

The guy with the parrot says, "He does more than just talk, watch." The guy lit a match and placed it under the parrots left foot. Then the parrot started singing "Jingle Bells", it was a Christmas Parrot.
The guy then placed the match under the right foot and the parrot then started to sing "The 12 days of Christmas."

The bartender said, "That's incredible". He then asked, "What does he say when you place them between his feet?"

The guy said, "You know I never tried that, let's see."

When the match was placed between the feet of the parrot the parrot began to sing a familiar tune... "Chesnuts roasting on an open fire."